A Look Back 7/10 - 7/16

Friday, 7/10:

• Got my hair cut. I decided to go back to my beloved pixie cut. This time though, keeping the front a little longer than I've had in the past. I was going to let my hair grow to the middle of my back or longer, but was getting annoyed by the mid length. I think I look my best with really long hair or really short. Also, I tend to hide behind long hair. I feel more confident with it short. I'll probably always keep it short now instead of my constant back and forth I've been doing since I was seventeen. And seriously - I lost two pounds just chopping it off!

Saturday, 7/11:

This is what a real mom of multiples looks like!

• Decided it was time to go grocery shopping when I used one of the last diapers for Killian and Piper after we ate breakfast. Luckily we had enough diapers to last through his morning blow-out. Sanitize wash kind of day.
• Dropped the kids off at my parent's house so Dan and I could go shopping without distraction. After unloading the groceries at home, we went back to my parent's to have dinner. My sister's boyfriend was there and this was the first time we met him. After dinner, Lily had to go #2. After helping her wipe her butt, this was the conversation...

Lily: "Does everybody want to see my poopoo?" 

Me: "I don't think everybody wants to see your poopoo."

Lily: Maybe not everybody, but somebody wants to see my poopoo."

Me: "Well, maybe you should ask if anybody wants to see it."

Lily: Now out of the bathroom and in the dining room, goes up to my sister's boyfriend, "Do you want to see my poopoo?" 

Me: Laughing silently. Sadly not embarrassed by this question coming out of my 3 year old's mouth. I am a true mom. 

Sunday, 7/12:

• We revisited a park at an Elementary School close to where we used to live before buying our house. The memories came back to the days where we watched Lily slide down a slide for the first time, and the times we took the ten minute walk from our apartment so Lily could play. At least this park isn't too far away. I really like it and will want to go back more often.

Monday, 7/13:

• Killian and Piper turned 9 months old. Took the monthly shots. All my babies are getting so big.

Tuesday, 7/14:

• Lily turned 3-1/2 years old. She's so beautiful, inside and out.
• Took Killian and Piper to the doctor for their 9 month checkup. Here are the stats:

Killian is 25 pounds, 14 ounces, 29 inches

Piper is 22 pounds, 1 ounce, 28 inches 

• The pediatrician thinks I'm lying when I tell her what they eat during the day. She thinks I'm overfeeding them, but I'm not. They eat three times a day: 22oz of formula a day, 1/4 cup of cereal (rice) + 1/2 banana or 1oz applesauce each for breakfast, 4oz of vegetables each for lunch, and 1/4 cup of cereal (oatmeal) each for dinner which I'll now be replacing with a protein. How is that over feeding them? I like their pediatrician, she was my pediatrician, but I think it's time to look for another. At least to get another opinion about their weights and hopefully someone who doesn't make faces when I tell them exactly what I feed my babies.

Wednesday, 7/15:

• Lily likes looking at this book we have - 100 First Words. She, for some reason likes it as her bedtime book. This was a fun moment in parenting...

Lily: "That a goose. What do goose eat?"

Me: "Umm. I think grass or corn."

Lily: "No."

Me: "No? So what do they eat, then?"

Lily: "Maybe... little girls don't go to bed."

Me: "They eat little girls that don't go to bed?"

Lily: "Yes."

Alrighty then. Sounds good to me!

• Took some videos... 

I love how Killian tries to put the pacifier back into Piper's mouth.

I love how Piper seems to be like, "Wait a sec. This isn't mine. Here Killian, take yours back." And Killian's all like, "Nah. I'm good. I got yours now."

Thursday, 7/16:

• I am officially ten pounds lighter than I have been since before I got pregnant with Lily. That's right! I haven't weighed what I weigh for four plus years. It feels good but I'm not done. Still not feeling my best, so I will continue on my path.

Just Don't Do It

A picture from Uncanny Annie's facebook page seems to be making the rounds on social media and I thought I might put my two cents in, for what it's worth. Being a mom of twins has definitely opened my eyes to a world that I never knew existed when my daughter (now 3-1/2 years old) was a baby. It's so different being out and about with twins, and I'm not talking about all the stuff I lug around. No, it's the comments and looks from complete strangers. So I had a thought, for all you people out there that think it's OK to ask personal questions to a mom of twins (or more), this is how it would be if you asked the same kind of questions to a singleton mom:

You would never think to ask a mother of a singleton how she conceived, so let's look at the questions I get asked on a regular basis when I'm out with my twins and 3 year old. BUT instead of looking at the questions as they are asked about twins, let's look at them as they would be asked about a singleton. Yes, may seem ridiculous, but so are the questions...

I was in Kohl's the other day with all three of my kids. My three year old happily jumping around the racks of clothes while my twins were happily playing with their stroller toys. I was shopping for me, something I rarely do these days, but I needed a dress for an upcoming wedding. So there I am, minding my own business and, no exaggeration, every person that I passed or who passed me stared at my twins and/or made a comment. Sometimes the comments were to me, sometimes they were to my three year old, and other times they were just out there in the air for me to hear or not. Three different women asked my three year old, "So, your the big sister? How nice that you got two baby brothers to look after." Uh, my twins are clearly boy/girl. So I don't put bows in my twin daughter's hair, but I dress her in girly clothes. On this particular day, my son was wearing a Star Wars shirt and dark gray shorts, and my twin daughter was wearing a turquoise tank with a pink, purple, and yellow polka dotted skirt. Clearly anyone who just glanced at my babies could tell they were different sexes. These three women though, were blind. They had to be.

Then there was the woman who told me, as she was touching my twin's feet, that she knew a set of twins once. Oh, good for you! I just smiled and slowly backed my stroller up so she would get the hint to "Stop touching my babies with your dirty stranger hands!" Seriously, don't ever touch a baby or a child unless you know the mother or father personally.

OK, I think I made my point here. For all of you who still don't get it, let me recap:

1. It's very nice that you are curious about twins, but please refrain from asking personal questions. It's rude and frankly non of your business. If you're that curious about how twins are conceived or if twins run in families, look it up on the internet. Just don't ask us.
2. Don't touch my kids. It makes me uncomfortable and it makes my kids uncomfortable. Unfortunately, most kids are too naive or respectful of adults to tell the person not to touch. Also, you might get bitched out by the mom. Sorry not sorry. Those are my kids and you are a stranger. Just don't do it.
3. Don't get pissy because all of us twin mommies (or triplet, quads, etc) don't want most of the attention when we are out and about. Give us a break. We're lucky to even be out and about. Don't bombard us with questions we don't really care to answer. Always think, "Would I be asking this mom the same questions if she just had one baby?" If the answer is yes, then it might be OK to ask, but if the answer is no, just don't do it. 
4. Look, I am very aware that some women may feel the need to ask certain questions because of their own personal reasons/struggles and I feel for you. Believe me, I went through so much pain and heartache to have my three babies. But that doesn't mean I want to discuss my trials with every stranger EVERY SINGLE TIME I leave my house. That's why some women write blogs. Look some up on the internet if your curious about other women's reproductive journeys. That's what it's there for.
5. Lastly, if you are to make a comment, please be respectful and make it quick. We really just want to get in and get out of wherever we are before the next feeding or tantrum pursues.

Thank you for reading!

A Look Back 7/3 - 7/9

Friday, 7/3:

• Conversation at 12:45 in the morning... 

Lily: "Lily so drinky. So long since I eat."

Me: "You're thirsty?"

Lily: "Yeah. Lily drinky. Check my temturer." **Takes the forehead thermometer and scans forehead**

Lily: **Shows thermometer to me** "4-0-5, Mommy."

Me: "Oh yes. 4-0-5. I see. Big temperature."

• Lily had a dentist appointment. It was a normal cleaning but I did have a concern about a black spot on her back left molar. Yup... a cavity. Ugh! A three year old with a cavity? Are you serious? Now she has to get a filling. I wrote a post about it HERE.
• In minivan with Lily, stopped at a red light...

Lily: "Mommy! That a nice house!"

Me: "What house?"

Lily: "That. Is that a house?" **Points to a 7-Eleven**

Me: "No. That's a store."

Lily: "Oh." 

Saturday, 7/4:

• Went out to my aunt's house in Greenport. Saw the tall ships... from afar. Didn't want to spend the day online waiting to get on one. 
• Lily went on the carousel with Dan, my sister Jackie, and my dad. She insisted on sitting on a white horse. When she saw a kid get on a white horse, she started to cry saying it was her horse.

• My brother let me have a sip of his beer. I wanted to drink it all. Actually, I wanted to pour some over vanilla ice cream, crawl up on the couch hugging the bowl, breathing in the delicious aroma that is root beer, and getting drunk in the process. A mom can dream, right?

Sunday, 7/5:

• Went to a birthday party for a girl I went to school with's son who was turning four. It was a Mickey Mouse party and they had a Mickey character there. Lily was so happy because she loves Mickey Mouse. While she was standing near him, she kept calling his name and asking him if he wanted some lemonade. 

Monday, 7/6:

• Hung out with a friend I haven't seen since I was pregnant with my twins. I think she enjoyed playing at the park more than Lily!

Tuesday, 7/7:

• Killian and Piper were in a pool for the first time. A little sitting pool, but a pool non-the-less. They liked it... I think. They didn't complain, not even when Killian spit up. So gross!

Wednesday, 7/8:

• Lily has been very observant about what she thinks is dangerous. While watching Disney's Tarzan, she kept saying, "Mommy, that danaous." Yes, Lily, don't ever "surf" on a tree limb. That is definitely "danaous!" She cracks me up!!

Thursday, 7/9:

•  Killian & Piper had their first ride in a swing! Piper seemed to really enjoy it. Every time the swing stopped, she kicked her legs, wanting to swing some more. Killian, on the other hand, didn't quite know what to make of it. He was actually swinging it himself. He kept moving his body a little back and forth. I think he was a little scared.

•  I had all three in the kitchen with me while I was preparing dinner. I needed to keep an eye on them, especially Lily who likes to think she is big enough to pick up and move Killian and Piper. While they were playing with Lily's magnetic alphabet toy, this happened...

• Killian loves his feet. Actually, he loves everybody's feet. Here's a short video of him telling me that...

A Look Back 6/26 - 7/2

• Friday, 6/26: Killian and Piper have been paying attention to one another a lot lately. I caught this on video...

• Saturday, 6/27: Pulled off Dan's surprise Star Wars 40th Birthday Party. Killian and Piper were amazing with all the people in our house. Didn't cry once. Lily was amazing as well. She was such a good sharer of her toys. So proud of her. I posted a blog about what I did for the party HERE.

Dan NEVER comes in the side door, but of course, decides to do it on this day.

• Sunday, 6/28: Lily begged for the ice cream man. Stopped the ice cream man. Lily got a vanilla cone with rainbow sprinkles. Took two licks of it and said, "Lily done. Tummy says, 'Thank you. I full.'"
• Piper's the sleepy princess. Caught this on video...

• Monday, 6/29: Lily has a dentist appointment this week but on one of my calendars it said, "Thursday at 11:30am" and on another calendar it said, "Friday at 11:30am." So I called the dental office and they said her appointment is on Friday at 12:30pm. Uh. OK. This is an example of mommy brain.
• Killian and Piper were in their cribs alone in the bedroom and I heard laughing. I poked my head in and they were facing each other, both on their bellies, making the other laugh. First time I have heard them communicating like that. Wish I caught that on video. 
• Tuesday, 6/30: Woke up feeling OK but as the day went on I felt more and more sick. Horrible ear pain and terrible pain when I swallowed. I was also getting dizzy and had tightening in my chest. At 5:45pm I took my temperature and it was 101.2º. I figured I shouldn't wait to go to the doctor since if I was contagious with something I didn't really want to get the whole house sick. Turns out they couldn't find anything wrong. I hate that! The doctor did say that it may just be too early for the strep test to come back positive. There may just not be enough bacteria to detect strep at this point. Because of my symptoms though, he treated it as strep and now I'm on antibiotics for ten days. I just hope no one else gets sick, especially Lily, Killian, and Piper.
• Caught this on video, Killian giving Piper a pillow...

• ... and this where Lily gives raspberries to everyone and everything...

• Thursday, 7/2: Lily has been saying, "Oh my God, Oh my God." It's the funniest thing. She scraped her knee Wednesday, so today, Thursday, she said, "Oh my God. Look at my booboo. Oh my God." I tried not to laugh in front of her.
• At bedtime, Lily has the realization she, too will get a period...

Lily: "When Lily bigger girl, Lily have blood like you."

Me: "What?"

Lily: "Lily have blood like Mommy. One day. Not now. When Lily big girl like Mommy."

Me: "Yes, yes you will." **laughing so hard in my head** 

 

A Look Back 6/19 - 6/25

• Saturday, 6/20: Lily and I were looking at a picture of me when I was pregnant with Killian and Piper...

Lily- "When Lily big girl, me have Piper in my belly."

Me- "Well, you can have your own baby inside your belly."

Lily- "NO! ME HAVE PIPER IN MY BELLY!!"

Me- "OK. Calm down."

Lily- "Can Lily have Piper and killian in my belly?"

Me- "Sure, Lily. You can maybe have twins, too."

• Sunday, 6/21: Father's Day. It was a lovely day that consisted of breakfast in the morning, just the five of us. Lily gave Daddy her gift... Matching Mickey Mouse shirts. 
  

Then I took a pic of all of them...

Then I got the best father's Day gift of all... yeah, you heard that right. Dan took the kids to his parent's house and I got to spend some much needed alone time to get a few things done. After I danced and sang my heart out to a very loud mix of my favorite 90's girl bands, I cleaned a bit. It was a good time!

• Monday, 6/22: Lily is too funny...

Lily- "Piper is a brother."

Me- "No. Piper is a sister. Killian is a brother." 

Lily- "Killian is a son and Daddy is a son."

Me- "That's right! And what are you?"

Lily- "Lily a moon."

•  Also Monday, 6/22: This happened-

• Killian got his 2nd tooth this week. Now he has both bottom fronts. Piper already has four teeth. Is it wrong for me to tell Killian he's losing to his sister in the milestone department. Maybe I should stop that since, 1: it really isn't a competition. And 2: I really don't want them to feel like everything is a competition with the other.

A Look Back 6/12 - 6/18

• Killian and Piper turned 8 months old on Saturday, 6/13. 
• Took some great shots of the kids...

• Visited the Nassau County Museum of Art on Sunday, 6/14, where Dan and I were married back in September of 2009. After giving Killian and Piper lunch, we packed everybody in the van, picked up lunch for Dan, myself, and Lily, and headed to the museum to have lunch in the formal gardens at the very spot we said our I do's. Lily kept asking where the "real" park was and when we were going there. We told her that not all parks have slides and swings, but being three years old, she just didn't get it.

• On Tuesday, 6/16, it rained on and off. I let Lily put her bathing suit on and we went outside to feel the rain on us. It wasn't thundering or lightning out, so why not? It's natures sprinkler! Anyway, I decided to do some weeding in the rain. I should always do the weeding in the rain. It felt nice not having the hot sun beating down on me while working outside and the added bonus of the cool raindrops made it even better.
• Wednesday, 6/17, was Lily very last day of an early educational school we've been going to since she was 8 months old. We started out doing Mommy and Me classes then I started dropping Lily off there for a two hour session each week for the past year and a half or so. It's a bittersweet ending to this stage in her life. Come September, she will start pre-K and I will no longer be able to call Lily a toddler, she will be a pre-schooler. 

                         
                                                      Ms. Rhona                                                                           Ms. Denise

• On Thursday, 6/18, Lily said the strangest thing to me. It was one of those "kids say the darndest things" moments, but I thought about it too much and now I'm feeling weird, like she knows something I don't. Here's how it went down: We were going through a picture book of 100 first words and Lily was naming everything in the book. Something I was very proud of because of her speech issues she had last year. Anyway, there was a parrot in the book and she said she wanted one. Then I said I like birds and maybe one day we could get one. Then she looked over at a toy parrot she has and said...

"Mommy, Lily already has a parrot."

"OK, Lily. Maybe we can get a real one someday."

"Mommy, when you are a little girl again, like me, you can have one." 

Hmm? A little girl again? So, does she think we get reincarnated? Maybe she thinks I'm like Benjamin Button? Or, most likely, she's three years old and has no clue what she just said! 

7 Spring/Summer Activities To Do With the Kiddies

Since I was "out of service" last spring and summer, due to hauling around two growing human beings inside of me, there was a lot I couldn't do with Lily, my then two year old. So here's my list of things to do this spring and summer with my now three year old and my twins.

1. The Bronx Zoo. Hell yeah! Can't wait to see the reaction of my three year old when she sees all the animals from her books and television shows in person.

2. The Mystic Aquarium. A little road trip to Connecticut for the day won't be such a bad thing. I really like this aquarium. It's a good size to see lots of sea life. If we think it'll be too much though, we can always go to the Long Island Aquarium in Riverhead. I've never been and I don't think my husband has either so it'll be a new experience for all. Plus, depending how we would go to Mystic, we would pass it anyway.

3. The beach. Sounds simple enough... just have to slather on a ton of sunscreen and pick one of many here on the island to go to.

4. Eisenhower Park. A staple when I was growing up. I'd love to buy a kite and fly it there with Lily. Also a great place for her to ride her tricycle with better scenery than what's on our block.

5. Montauk Point Lighthouse. Who doesn't like visiting a lighthouse?

6. The many carnivals that hit the island around the summer holidays. We did go to a couple last summer but I really couldn't enjoy myself fully. (In the below picture I was 17 weeks pregnant with Killian and Piper. 17 WEEKS!! Look how big I was.) Plus, this time Lily will actually be tall enough to ride the kiddy rides without having to argue about how tall she is.

7. Have a scavenger hunt. What will we collect or check off the list while walking through the park or just around the block? A yellow flower? A flat rock? An acorn? A blue car?

Click HERE to scroll through & print out a wide selection of scavenger hunts!

There are other things that I want to do, but these are the biggies. Now, can we make it happen? The weather is already warm enough to start these any time. Just gotta do it!

So, what's on your Spring/Summer Check Off List?

I Love You, Mommy

So simple, those four words. So simple and yet so powerful in their meaning. "I love you, Mommy." Out of nowhere I hear those four words. Out of nowhere I hear a sweet little voice whisper them to me and I think for a moment, what does "I love you" mean to a three year old?

Even before Lily was born I loved her. From the moment she was conceived at my fertility doctor's office, with my husband standing next to me with the highest of hopes, I loved her. Our Rainbow Baby. I told her every day, throughout the day while rubbing my belly. When she was born, I whispered it in her ear as I held her close, "I love you, Lily."

1/14/2012 - Lily's Birth Day

I know what those words mean to me. They mean that I will always and forever be on her side. Her needs will always come before mine. She will never be without a piece of my heart and so she will always feel my love even when I am no longer here (which goes for all three of my babies). But, I wonder... what do those words mean to a three year old? Does she really know what love is? Does she say those words because I so often say them to her? No. I believe she knows. I believe she gets it now just like she gets what being sorry is. She knows that I am her mommy and I will always protect her and be here for her and for that, she loves me.

3/1/2015 - Selfie fun

Out of nowhere I hear a sweet little voice whisper, "I love you, Mommy" and in that moment I feel alive.

Lily Didn't Do It

Nope. Lily didn't do it. She didn't write on her table. My three year old is very clear that her friends Roar and Robot did it!

I love her imagination. Her imaginary friend, Roar, is the monster from her room that used to scare her until I told her to introduce herself to him. Now they are besties! Her friend Robot came along after we watched the movie The Iron Giant. Then, of course, she has to make her other friends help clean up. These would include the Fisher Price Corn Popper and the Fisher Price Little People City Skyway.

So, yes, this video is primarily about Lily, but I can't help but notice all that unfolded laundry. I think there's three baskets full. Yes, all clean. This is like an everyday event around here. There is always at least one basket of laundry hanging around needing to be folded and put away. Hey, there are five of us, or more accurately, one three year old and two six month olds who go through clothes and bibs and burp cloths and blankets like it's the coolest thing to constantly be doing laundry. Well, it is the coolest thing, isn't it? Please tell me it's cool.

Sibling Fun

Yesterday, I was in the kitchen when I heard Lily call me to come see her. Uh oh. What was she doing this time? Then, as I came out of the kitchen, I saw this...

I love that Lily wants to play with her 6 month old brother and sister, but did I love the fact that she somehow climbed into the pack n play to do so? Uh... maybe not so much. I didn't here any screams of pain or crying, so I guess she made it in there without stepping or falling on one or both of them. That's a plus!

You Know You're A Parent of "3 under 4" When...

1. ... you hate laundry day because everyday is laundry day.
2. your 3 year old wants to march to the kitchen, bathroom, around the dining room table, or just about anywhere and you get tired after the first few steps.
3. ... before you feed the twins, you change one of their diapers and think "I can wait to change the other one's diaper until after they eat." Or you don't change both of their diapers until after they eat because, well, you'll just have to change them both again right after they eat anyway.
4. ... getting out of bed anytime in the night with twins is dreaded because you know as soon as you take care of one baby, you'll get all cozy in bed again and the other one will wake up.
5. ... you secretly jump for joy when someone, anyone, calls you up to take even just one child off your hands for a few hours - even if it's just to come over to play in his/her room.
6. ... it takes you two hours to get everyone ready and in their car seats to go out somewhere.
7. ... you have given up trying hard for your 3 year old not to put her snotty, coughy, grimy hands all over your 6 month old twins' faces. It's better for everyone to be sick at the same time anyway, right?
8. ... you realize you're sorta an expert when it comes to multitasking and laugh at parents of one who complain about not being able to get stuff done.
9. ... you fantasize about running away to a remote island or your car for a few hours.
10. ... you have all three kids hanging on you and you think, "I have an amazing life" then someone spits up all over your shirt.
11. ... someone spits up all over your shirt and you smile because you know you'll be doing another load of laundry that day anyway.

Toddlers and Markers

OK, cute. Right? Also funny, but being the parent of a child who does this, you gotta be very careful how you react. When my three year old came into my bedroom Sunday morning with a huge smile on her face screaming excitedly, "Mommy! Lily O K.C.! Lily O K.C.!" I should not have laughed. Not out loud, at least. But I did. It was funny. She was funny.

Let's take this back a bit so you understand where my daughter came up with the idea to "tattoo" herself. My big brother, my only brother, has a ton of tattoos. Here's a picture so you can kinda get the idea:

This was Lily and my brother when she was two and a half months old, so she's seen tattoos her whole life. Nothing out of the ordinary for her. My brother, her uncle (or "O" as Lily puts it) also has a beard. Again, nothing out of the ordinary for her. Every time Lily sees a guy with a beard or sees tattoos, she immediately associates it with her "O K.C."

So, that was the back story. Flash forward to this past Sunday and now you know why she drew on herself. She wanted to be like her O K.C. and have tattoos. I have no idea why she was thinking about that and what prompted her to pick up the marker, but she did and it was very funny. I always see or hear stories about children who do this type of thing but never imagined my daughter would do it. I, myself, had once drawn on my body with a kid's blue eyeshadow "crayon." Long story short, I fell asleep and because I was a very heavy sleeper, my aunt and parents thought I was unconscious, turning blue because I was dying and rushed me to the hospital. I didn't wake up until after the nurse called over the speaker, "Code Blue!" and the doctor realized what was really going on. Good times. I wonder if my parents laughed about that one when we all got home from the hospital?

Anyway, let me say again how I should not have laughed out loud... This picture was from yesterday (Monday).

Great. Now she gave herself a beard. Still proclaiming she's O K.C. and very proud of herself. Remind me to hide the markers! At least we only buy washable markers, crayons, and paint for her so cleanup wasn't that bad. I also should be relieved that her artistic abilities of making herself look oh so fantastic, didn't spill over to her baby brother and sister who were sitting by her, most likely watching her do this to herself. So, thanks Lily? I guess?

Why I Know It's OK To Cry At Any Milestone

It's a sad day indeed. My three year old said "Killian." Well, she really said "Killilan" but close enough. Killian is her baby brother. I should be happy that she said his name. She's been able to say her sister's name, Piper, for a while now, so why is it making me sad for her to say her brother's?

To answer this question we must go back a year. January 2014 to be exact. January of 2014, around the time of her second birthday, Lily was only saying one coherent word, "Daddy." She then had her own language for everything else, including her own version of sign language. Point was, she needed speech therapy. We went through all the channels to get her an in-home therapist twice a week. Within six months, Lily was putting words together and you could sorta follow what she was saying. Then, by her third birthday this past January, she was done with speech and talking up a storm. There are still some words that she just can't say, but she's three and it just makes her sound so darn cute.

Anyway, one of these words was her brother's name, Killian. She could never pronounce it and her version of his name was "Titi." Don't ask me how she got Titi from Killian, but she did and I liked it. It would be what she called him, forever. Her own nickname for him. Unfortunately, it would come to an end. Out of the blue, a couple of days ago, she pointed at her brother and said, "Killilan." I was very proud of her for saying his name correctly. It didn't quite hit me though until she started saying it all the time. I asked her if she will still call him Titi and she responded with, "No Mommy. He Killilan." I teared up. I wanted to full on cry, but then I thought that was silly of me, plus my husband was home from work and I didn't really want to explain why I was crying in fear I would cry even harder.

My little girl is growing up. She's accomplished so much with her speech, but it hasn't really sunk in to what that really means until she said that one word, "Killilan." Lily is not my baby anymore. She's my toddler going on pre-schooler. She's picking out her own clothes to wear everyday and making other choices like what to eat and what color she likes - white. She's slowly becoming her own little person and it makes me so happy and so sad at the same time. I can only imagine that other moms and dads feel the same when their children reach a certain age or hit a certain milestone. It makes me wonder about my own parents and what was it that I did or said that made them think I wasn't their baby anymore? For that matter, what was it that my older brother did and my two younger sisters did to make them think that? Did it make them as happy and as sad as it's making me feel?

I don't even want to think about when my twins get to that point 'cause that will be it for me - no more babies. That part of my life will be over. I think that makes me feel the saddest. That's why I know it's OK that I cried over that one little word. That's why I know it's OK to cry at any milestone. My babies can't stay babies forever, except, maybe in my heart.

Dear Children,

This is your mother. You know, the one who sacrificed a lot to carry you inside of my womb? The one who painstakingly pushed you out into this world? You know me as Mommy? Anyway, I am writing to you today to let you know of a few fun facts about life right now. This is not to make you feel in any way, guilty or embarrassed. You should feel loved knowing that I am taking the time to write about you three and how you all make me feel. You should also feel honored that my love for you is now out there in cyberland for all to view. You are famous to those ten or so people who actually read my blog. Congratulations!

1. Please know that I love all three of you so deeply that it can make me cry at any point.
2. Lily, you are our first born, our rainbow baby, and continue to be our light after any dark storm. You alway want us to be happy and ever since you came into our lives, we truly are.
3. Killian, you are my little mushmallow, my cuddle monkey, and are just a sweet, little baby boy who can melt my heart with just a glance.
4. Piper, you are our last born, the baby of the family. You are always so happy with the most amazing blue eyes that shine as bright as sapphires. Your smile is intoxicating. 
5. I'm not too fond of your potty training or lack there of, Lily. I guess I have myself to blame, for the most part, but come on! You know when you have to go. You've kept yourself dry, always using the potty, for a whole week and then for a day here and there. Just do it all the time now. Contrary to what you may think, I do not like wiping your poopy butt.
6. Piper, it's not very nice to laugh at your twin brother when he cries. That goes for you too, Killian. Just stop laughing at each other when the other is having a hard time. It's not to say I don't find it a little funny, 'cause I do, but it's gotta stop.
7. Lily, farting on me and then saying, "Lily farted on Mommy" and laughing is kinda gross, not to mention rude. Please outgrow that soon.
8. Killian and Piper, I do have to say that I appreciate you not screaming your heads off when you have a dirty, poopy diaper, but a little heads up would be nice. I don't really like thinking that you have a clean diaper and then smelling, what I can only describe as toxic garbage, from across the room. Oh, and thank you for pooing at the same time almost always. The smell is doubled which makes me think that's where the term, "double trouble" came from.
9. Lily, can you please stop thinking that bedtime is nap time? You are three years old. You should be able to sleep through the night. And news flash: you used to sleep through the night before Killian and Piper came home. Just because you're a Big Sister now, doesn't mean that you should start acting like the baby. Killian and Piper will be six months old next week and they've been sleeping through the night for about four months now. I'm not telling you to be more like them, but please, be more like them and sleep through the night.
10. Killian, please stop spitting up three hours after you ate. It doesn't make sense and it's kinda annoying. I don't want you to have to constantly wear a bib, but if you're gonna be "Mr. Spit-up" then so be it.
11. Piper, I like that you are trying to sit up all on your own, but please know that you don't have to constantly try to do it. I mean, it's OK to relax every once in a while. Especially at feeding time or when you are already sitting up. Stop pushing your head forward and clenching your fists to your chest. We get it. You want to be a big girl, but it's really not a race here. Slow down.

There's a lot more I can discuss with you three, but I'll save some for later. Just please always remember that Mommy loves you, Lily, Killian, and Piper. Mommy loves you more than the beating of my own heart. 

I'll finish this post with a quote from Led Zeppelin's Thank You:

If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you.

And The Samples' Nothing Lasts For Long:

Maybe nothing lasts for ever
Not the mountains or the sea
But the times we have together
They will always be with me

Love with all that I am and all I ever will be,

Mommy

Twins After A Singleton

When we found out I was carrying twins, my first thought was, "We need a minivan." My second thought was "How am I going to split up my heart to love all three of my children equally?" When you have one child, all of your love is meant for that one child. My husband goes to work everyday and I'm a stay at home mom so my days were filled with quality alone time with my daughter. It was just me and her throughout the day and I loved it. We had our morning routine, our afternoon routine, and once my husband came home, a night routine for the three of us. So when we found out there would not only be one baby breaking up the routine, but two, I was a little more than nervous about it.

How was my daughter going to react when it wasn't just her and me anymore? Having twins would take up a lot more of my time than if it was just one. How was I going to manage it? How was I going to love these two new babies as much as I love my daughter? Would I be able to still have quality alone time with my daughter and quality alone time with the two other babies?

I was scared. Scared until our twins came home from the NICU. Our beautiful, sweet, and caring toddler was all about the babies. She was and is like a little mommy. She's nurturing and loving towards them. It's an amazing thing to see. I think about some stories I've heard about older siblings reacting badly towards the new baby and we've definitely lucked out with not having to worry about that. She is the Big Sister and loving every second of it.

Funny thing is that my heart did get split up equally for all three of my children. I don't know how, but it did. All the worrying should've been geared towards another concern. A concern that I had no clue about until our twins were home with us. "Am I spending enough time with our twins?"

Yes, I spend everyday, all day with our twins, but our bonding time is somewhat limited. They share my attention with not only each other, but with a three year old who still remembers what it was like before they got here. A time when she had all of my attention. It's so difficult to just sit and hold my twins individually for a period of time before I have to pay attention to the other one or my toddler. I used to hold my toddler for hours. Just staring at her, caressing her face, memorizing every little fold in her chubby little arms and legs. Studying the curve of her mouth and just breathing her sweet baby scent in. I'm lucky if I get five minutes to do that with my twins. My three year old is a three year old. She wants to play all the time and wants all the attention on her. It's hard when I tell her I can't play because I have to not only take the time to feed one baby, but two. Then it's time to change, not one diaper, but two. Then it's time to calm down, not one baby, but two. Put, not one baby down for a nap, but two. Check in on, not one baby, but two. And so on, and so on, and so on. What might take a half hour with a singleton is now taking an hour or more with twins. That is my biggest concern now. How does this affect my toddler? The constant, "No, I'm sorry. I can't right now I have to ___ with the babies."

Luckily, my three year old is patient (as patient as a three year old can be). She will wait for me to be done with the babies, for now, but will her patience run thin? I just feel guilty sometimes. Guilty for always having to say to my toddler, "One more second." and "I'll be right there after I ____ with the babies." Guilty for not being able to hold my twins for hours like I did when my toddler was their age. Guilty for feeling guilty. I'm sure most moms go through this, especially moms of twins after a singleton. I guess we just have to keep reminding ourselves that we are doing the best we can with what we were given - one body, two arms, two hands, and only twenty-four hours in the day.

Theme Song Sing-A-Long

Here, in no particular order, are the theme songs from some of my three year old's favorite shows. When we hear these songs, we both get up, dance around the living room, and sing as loud as we can. It's a lot of fun and it's something that has become a Mommy/Daughter activity. I love it and I know she does, too. It's also so super cute when she starts singing the songs when the shows aren't even on.

1. Doc McStuffins Theme song - Disney Junior

Time for your check-up, time for your check-up.
Gonna check your ears, check your eyes, find out how much you've grown.
Listen to your heartbeat, fix you up, ready to go.
It's OK if you giggle, this will only tickle a little.
Time for your check up, time for your check-up.

2. Curious George Theme Song - PBS

You never do know what's around the bend
A big adventure or a brand new friend
When you're curious, like Curious George
(Swing!)

Well everything (everything!) is so glorious (glorious!) And everything (everything!) is so wonderous (wonderous!) There's more to explore
When you open your door
And meet friends like this
You just can't miss
(Whooooa!)

Get curious (curious!) and that's marvelous (marvelous!) And that's your reward
You'll never be bored
If you ask yourself, what is this?
Like curious, like curious, like Curious George

3. Max & Ruby Theme Song - Nick Jr.

Max & Ruby
Ruby & Max

Max & Ruby

Ruby & Max

Max & Ruby

Ruby & her little brother Max

Max & Ruby

4. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Theme Song - Disney Junior

M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E
Mickey: It's me!
M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E
It's the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Come inside, it's fun inside
It's the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse roll call!
Donald! Donald: Present.
Daisy! Daisy: Here.
Goofy! Goofy: Hyuck, here.
Minnie! Minnie: Hi, here!
Pluto! Pluto: Ruff ruff ruff
Mickey! Mickey: Right here.
It's the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Come inside, it's fun inside
M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E

5. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Closing Song - Disney Junior

Hot dog! (Hot dog) Hot dog!
Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog Now we got ears, it's time for cheers
Hot dog, hot dog, the problem's solved Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog
Grab my boots and a sandwich Let's start a parade Get the coconut drum kit For Daisy to play
Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog We're taking off, we're dancing now Hot dog, leapfrog, and holy cow Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog
Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog It's a brand new day Whatcha waiting for? Get up, stretch out, stomp on the floor
Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog We're splitting the scene We're full of beans
So long for now from Mickey Mouse (That's me!) And the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse

6. Super Why! Theme Song - PBS

Who’s got the power?
The power to read.
Who answers the call for friends in need?

Super WHY!
Super WHY!
He’s the guy, he’s Super WHY!

Who’s got the power?
The power to read.
Who looks into books for the answers we need?

Super WHY!
Super WHY!
and the Super Readers, we’re gonna fly,

Come along
With the Super Readers.
Adventure waits when you’re with Super WHY!

Super WHY and the Super Readers yeah
Super WHY and the Super Readers.

Adventure waits when you’re with Super WHY!
Yeah Super WHY!

7. Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood Theme Song - PBS

It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor.
Would you be mine, could you be mine, would you be my neighbor.
Its Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood a land of make believe, won’t you ride along with me (ride along..)
Its Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood so much to do so much to see, won’t you ride along with me (ride along..)
I got lots of friends for you and me, in this land of make believe, a friendly face on every street just waiting to greet you.
It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor, Daniel tiger’s Neighborhood!

8. Sophia the First Theme Song - Disney Junior

I was a girl in the village doing alright
Then I became a princess overnight
Now I gotta figure out how to do it right
So much to learn and see

Up in the castle with my new family
In a school that's just for royalty
A whole enchanted world is waiting for me
I'm so excited to be (Sofia the first)

I'm finding out what being royal's all about (Sofia the first)
Making my way it's an adventure everyday (Sofia)
It's gonna be my time (Sofia)
To show them all that I'm Sofia the first!

A Visit With the Easter Bunny

It was a typical Sunday. 7 am wake up call from my three year old leaning in close to my face and breathing heavily on me, laughing. My five month old twins making noises in their cribs while kicking their tiny legs a mile a minute. My husband covering his head with the blankets in hopes to not having to get out of bed any time soon. Yes, a typical Sunday morning except this particular Sunday was going to be a little different, we were going to be leaving the house.

Leaving the house is not a big deal. Not a big deal if you don't have kids. Not a big deal if you don't have a toddler and five month old twins to get ready. On this day, this sunny, mild March day, my husband and I decided we would all go to the mall to get a picture with the Easter Bunny. We do it every year since our daughter was born. The Easter Bunny and Santa pictures at the mall. This would be the first picture with the Easter Bunny for our twins. How exciting, but was it worth it? (of course it was!)

We planned on leaving the house around three o'clock. This meant I had to start getting my toddler dressed and hair brushed at twelve o'clock. Yes, getting a three year old ready to leave the house really does take that long, at least for my three year old. It's a struggle. A struggle to go potty. A struggle to find the perfect pair of socks, no... tights, no... socks, yes... socks. A struggle to pick out what bow to put in her hair. A struggle to eat something before we leave. Can you see where I'm at? It's a three year old's world and I am just the mother.

I also had to get our twins dressed. This meant having the very delicate decision to either dress them before or after they ate. I opted before for our son and after for our daughter. Of course it didn't much matter. Our son spit up before he ate, while he ate, and after he ate. He even spit up in the car on our way to the mall.

We then had to get everyone in the minivan. My husband put our toddler and one of the twins in first. Then I brought out the diaper bag and the other twin. I sat in the driver's seat. "Did you remember the receipt for the Easter Bunny?" (we paid online). Shit. I have to go back inside. "My friend, Mommy! And my baby." OK, so I go back into the house and get the Bunny receipt and my daughter's friend, which happens to be one of those toy poppers (the toy with the handle that pops balls around inside a plastic bubble when you walk with it). I also pick out a random baby from her bed in hopes that she will just except the fact I didn't know which baby she was talking about. I get back to the car and success! She decided not to have a breakdown over the "wrong" baby I picked out.

With all that we made it to the mall. We were walking through the parking lot, I look down and notice our daughter had her shoes on the wrong feet. How is she not complaining? She complains about her shoes, sneakers, boots, all the time because she would rather be barefoot, yet she thinks having her shoes on the wrong feet is comfortable? Ugh. We get inside and I help her switch them around. Luckily that was a smooth process.

Walking through the mall with a running, skipping, just plain excited toddler and a double stroller with twins in tow is an interesting experience. We get comments like, "Oh, they must be twins." "Wow, they have their hands full." "You must be the big sister?" "What are they?" "Are they identical?" "Are they twins?" We also get smiling faces, chuckles, sometimes looks of sympathy. It's definitely different from just going out with one baby/kid. Having twins almost gives you a bright, blinking sign that says, "Hey everybody! Come check me and my family out. Look at my three under four mommy life. Look, I have twins and a toddler. Look, look, look!"

Anyway, we finally get to where the Easter Bunny is. We always do the "Fast Pass" (order online beforehand) so we don't have to wait on line. This saves us a lot of time and also helps deter a possible toddler and baby melt down. I had to prep my daughter beforehand, telling her that she would not be able to sit on the Easter Bunny's lap because her baby brother and sister would have to be held by him. She seemed OK with it. Once she saw the bunny, she didn't really seem to care where she was as long as it was near him anyway. She was so star struck. It was adorable, at least to me and my husband.

The photo went off without a hitch. No crying babies, everyone was awake, toddler was smiling and looking at the camera. It was great. But the best part of the day: my husband and I didn't have to be in the picture like we did when we saw Santa this past Christmas due to toddler not wanting me to let her go. I don't want to be in these pictures so, yes, that was the best part of the day!