A Look Back 8/21 - 8/27

Slow week...

Saturday, 8/22:

• Piper pulled herself up to stand for the first time!
• Went to a baby shower. It's funny how much your mindset changes after you already have kids and watch someone else open up shower gifts. It's not about how cute everything is anymore. Now it's all about practicality. I just kept saying to my mom, "She's not gonna need that." "That's useless." "Hope they gave her the gift receipt." 
• I bought this first-time mom something I know she will use. I was going to buy diapers and wipes, but then I thought about my three kiddies. I thought about the one thing that gets the most use. Something that even after 3-1/2 years of life, my daughter still uses. Something I used every single day and still do for my twins...  Circo® 4pk Flannel Receiving Blankets.
  Lily refuses to sleep with any other blanket. She usually will have all four blankets on her to sleep at night instead of her bed sheet and comforter.

Sunday, 8/23:

Monday, 8/24:

• Horrible day. Kept getting in my own way. Nothing was right, everything was a disaster. Ugh.
• Ok, so there was one good thing to come from this day. Got some great shots of Lily...

Thursday, 8/27:

• Took some pics of Lily. She wanted to be a bird fairy...

• Lily was playing with a ruler...

Lily: Holding the ruler up to my chest, "You're boobies are long. That's good."

Me: "What?"

Lily: "Mommy, check my boobies now. Lily have long boobies, too?"

Me: Trying not to laugh in her face.

A Look Back: 8/14 - 8/20

Friday, 8/14:

• Took Lily to get her cavity filled. Turns out she had two cavities, not one. 
• Lily had nitrous so she would be relaxed during the procedure. It worked. She sat perfectly for everything.

Sunday, 8/16:

• My blow dryer was on it's way out so I needed to pick up a new one. I decided to go to Target, alone! Even though I specifically went for the blow dryer, I decided to pick up the rest of Lily's school supplies. I shopped around, checked out, got in my van, drove away, and remembered one very important thing...

I NEVER BOUGHT THE BLOW DRYER!! Ugh.

Tuesday, 8/18:

• Went to a Mcdonald's, with the playground inside, for dinner so Lily could run around before bedtime. While there, two things occurred:

1. There was a family of six with one more on the way. Ages ranging from about three to about twelve. Lily was playing with the two youngest one's. The oldest, a girl of about twelve was wearing a tank top. I really wanted to go up to her parents and tell them to stop on the way home and buy that girl a training bra. Seriously! She needed one, bad. There are a lot of pervs out in the world, and this girl should not be walking around with her little girl boobies hanging out for all of them to see. Unfortunately, as my mom always says, "It's not mine."
2. While Lily was off playing, another little girl came up to Killian and Piper who were in their stroller. A nice, quiet girl with very long black hair in pigtails. I asked how old she was. She just looked at me. I asked, "Are you seven?" She gave me a look and said, "No." I asked, "Are you six? Eight?" She looked at me and said, "I'm four." Four? Really? This girl was super tall! Too tall to be only one year older than Lily. But, she was four. Anyway, she was making Piper laugh by putting her nose to Piper's hand and face. I wanted to tell the little pre-schooler not to touch Piper's face, but I felt weird about it. I have no problem telling an adult, but this innocent little girl made me feel like it was wrong to say something. Many times, the parents will say something to their kids, but her parents just ignored the fact she was even at our table. Maybe they didn't speak english? All the while, all I can think about is if this girl had her immunizations. Is she sick? Is anyone in her family sick? It was a little stressful. Next time I will definitely be as polite as I can be and just say, "Please don't touch the baby." 

• Lily tries to play catch with piper...

Wednesday, 8/19:

Lily: "What's your favorite animal, Mommy?"

Me: "I like giraffes. What's your favorite animal?"

Lily: "I like Piper and Killian." 

• Been watching Scooby Doo! Mystery Incorporated with Lily. It's on Netflix if interested...and you should be. This show rocks! Seriously. It was on for two seasons from 2010 to 2013. Even though they don't have the original theme song to Scooby Doo! Where Are You? I still sing it for Lily. She loves it. Here is her version of the song...

A Look Back 8/7 - 8/13

Friday, 8/7:

• Went out to Greenport with my mom and the kiddies. My mom had some left over carousel tickets from July 4th. Lily and I rode the horsies three times. 

Sunday, 8/9:

• Went to Eisenhower Park. Dropped Dan and the kids off to play at the playground area and I went to do a photo shoot. I had a great model who wanted Rockabilly style photos. I got some amazing shots. They are posted on my photography facebook page if you're interested in viewing. Then spread the word. Thanks.
• Piper crawled for the first time!

Tuesday, 8/11:

• Had a consultation for a different pediatrician. Thanks to the recommendations of 4 different people we know, Lily, Killian, and Piper will now be going to Dr. Zaso in East Meadow. I liked what he had to say and he didn't judge me for having big babies. He just said that all babies grow at different rates and as long as they are within the parameters of what's healthy, everything is fine. This comment was unlike their now former pediatrician, who just told me I was overfeeding Killian and Piper and then leaving it at that with no suggestions on how to handle their weight. Oh, and when I told her what I was feeding them throughout the day, she didn't believe me. So disappointed since I've known that pediatrician since I was 12 years old. Oh well. Time for a change! 

Thursday, 8/13:

• Killian and Piper turned ten months old. They both are crawling. Killian pulls himself up to stand. Piper babbles up a storm. They both are picking up and eating finger snacks. Piper has eight teeth (four on top, four on bottom), Killian has six (four on top, two on bottom). Piper claps her hands whenever she gets excited or happy about something. And they both L-O-V-E their big sister, Lily.
• Had an eye exam. My eyes are a little worse than two years ago. Couldn't find frames I liked in that office so I told a couple of different ladies that worked there that I would shop around elsewhere for frames and bring them back to get fitted for the lenses. One woman was trying to tell me that I couldn't do that because the insurance was submitted for their office only. I explained to her that her office will do the lenses for prescription purposes, but I can and will get frames anywhere I want and my insurance will cover it. I told her I had done it in the past like that also. I think they might get commission on frames or something because another woman was trying to tell me that she will look in their basement for a style that I might like and call me when she has a few pairs to show. She said not to not go somewhere else since she probably can find something I will like. Then, a third woman was trying to convince me that every pair of frames looked good on me and I should just pick something. I told her I'm picky with what I put on my face because glasses are one of the first things people will notice about me. I have to really like what I will be wearing every single day for the next two years when my insurance says I can get new ones. Ugh. I hate people sometimes. 
• My mom and sister, Jackie, were over and we were sitting at my dining room table. Lily came over and sat on a chair...

Lily: "Mommy! One Beebo (points to my mom), two beebos (points to Jackie).

Me and my mom: Bahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! Sorry Jac. 

A Look Back 7/24 - 7/30

Friday, 7/24:

• Killian fell asleep in his highchair after breakfast...

• Went to Stride Rite with the kids and my mom to get Killian and Piper their first pair of shoes. Yes, you heard right, their first pair at nine months old. Thanks, Mom. 

Saturday, 7/25:

• Killian started to crawl for the first time. Very exciting!
• Piper started clapping her hands for the first time. Also exciting!

Sunday, 7/26:

• In the morning when we were still in bed, Lily wanted Dan to get her something that was under Piper's crib. After many "get it for me" requests, Dan said, "No, not now." Lily responded with, "Awe, you serious?" 
• Went to the pool today. First time for Killian and Piper. They liked it.
• FYI: (Piper is 9 months old) That ladybug bathing suit Piper is wearing was Lily's bathing suit that she had when she was 14 months old.

• Had a, "My baby is getting so big" moment when Dan took Lily in the regular pool and she was able to stand in the shallow end.

• Lily wanted to watch Sesame Street but it was very close to bedtime...

Lily: "Put on Sesame Street, please."

Me: "Sesame Street isn't on until tomorrow."

Lily: "It's on Heplix." (Netflix)

Me: Yup. She's got me there!

Monday, 7/27:

•  Killian is definitely Lily's little mini-me - boy version!

Tuesday, 7/28:

• Lily's new thing...

Lily: "Mommy, want to play in my room?"

Me: "Umm.." taking a little too long to answer.

Lily: "Mommy. Listen. Yes or no?"

Me: Thinking - Oh boy. She's a little smart ass already! 

Wednesday, 7/29:

• Trying to sell some baby gear that we don't need anymore. It's hard to part with the things my three babies used, even if we will never need them again. I wish I could keep everything and make a little museum for when I want to feel nostalgic and for when my three babies are adults and maybe wanting to see and feel what they had/used when they were born.

Thursday, 7/30:

• Don't you hate it when you're laying in bed and you put your arm up over your head, then all of a sudden you feel something tickling/crawling on your arm so you throw your arm up and sit up; looking around to see if you can find a bug, you see nothing; then you can't lay back down because now you're freaked out by the possibility that there was a bug on you and if you lay back down it will inevitably end up crawling in your ear? Yeah... that happened.
• I finally got to do something I wasn't able to do in a few days...

Lily: "Can I smell you, Mommy? Mmm. You smell good. You took shower and now are clean."

Me: Didn't realize I smelled so bad before. Luckily the stars aligned and I was able to take a five minute shower. 

A Look Back 7/17 - 7/23

Friday, 7/17:

• Dan and I went to a wedding and since we got dressed up I wanted a picture taken. Of course, our wonderfully cute and funny three and a half year old had to get in on it. She put on a pair of my shoes to look pretty and followed us out the door. For some reason, I can't remember, she wasn't wearing anything but her underwear. Hmm?
• The wedding reception was good. They had a live band, which I don't think I've ever been to a wedding with one. They were really good. I had been feeling slightly sick - a little soar throat and dry cough, but I didn't want it to ruin my good time. Unfortunately, I had one beer and got a headache and something I can only describe as heartburn, even though it wasn't quite heartburn. But I still tried my best to smile and dance a few times. Well, the highlight of the evening was when the head guy in the band kept eyeing me and kept signaling me to hit the dance floor. At one point he came over to me as I was eating salad and said, "Are you seriously eating your salad one leaf at a time?" Uh, no. Two leaves at a time! Anyway, at the end of the night the band had a lot of people gathered on the dance floor. Dan and I were there, too. The main guy started to do a back and forth singing thing with the crowd. I had a feeling that I should've been really vocalizing because he kept looking my way, but I had that soar throat thing going on. Well, he stopped, told the crowd to wait a minute 'cause he's been eyeing this couple all night, and then he came over to us. Ah! Now I'm in the spotlight. Exactly where I don't like to be. He actually told everybody that I was eating my salad one leaf at a time. Fortunately (or unfortunately), our friend, Kevin, caught most of it on video...

• Dan and I get home from the wedding around 2:00am and my mother, who had been babysitting, was up with our twins. They were wide awake. Never have they been up in the middle of the night for more than a second while we put their pacifiers back in their mouths. Luckily, they fell right to sleep when we put them down.

Saturday, 7/18:

• So, our twins had a repeat of waking up in the middle of the night. What the hell? We leave for one night and now chaos has ensued. Hopefully it doesn't become a habit.
• Yup, my slight sickness has now become something more. I actually was falling asleep on the couch in the afternoon - something I do not do unless I am really sick. This is so stupid, too because I just ended a ten day round of antibiotics for strep not four days ago.
• Was playing in Lily's room. She took down a doll from her bookshelf and handed it to me. She wanted to brush it's hair so she went to get a brush. As I was waiting for her, I shook the dolls hair and I saw something big and black jump out and go across my chest. I freaked, not knowing what it was and fearing the worst now that I had no clue where it went. I stood up and shook my, can I say dress, even though I was still in my nightgown at three o'clock in the afternoon? Anyway, I shook my... dress, and out came a big, black spider falling to the floor. I let out a scream then smashed it with one of Lily's toys. Luckily I got it 'cause I would not have been able to stay in the room any longer if I hadn't. Ugh! Heebeejeebees!!
• Walked in the bedroom to find Piper asleep like this...

• Lily looked very pretty in her dress...

• At bath time, Lily got a beard like her Uncle K.C. ...

Sunday, 7/19:

• Cleaning day. Still didn't feel well, but better than I had felt. Decided to clean the floors and do three loads of laundry. All in all a fun Sunday (sarcasm, people).

Monday, 7/20:

• Play date for Lily at our house. It must have been the hottest day of the summer so far. Brutal! I had set up our small kiddie pool and our water pad spray mat thing (don't know what it's called). Great to cool off the kids but for me and my mommy friend, the heat just did us in. I suggested playing inside and with little coaxing, the kids agreed.
• In the late afternoon, it started raining. It felt great. Since Killian and Piper were taking a nap, Lily and I walked around outside letting the rain cool us off. A fun time until I heard thunder. Where there's thunder, there's lightning, so in we went.

Tuesday, 7/21:

• Woke up early in the morning to the sound of Killian whimpering. He whimpers in his sleep all the time. I waited about a minute or two to see if he would calm down on his own. He seemed to stop and I looked over at Dan's side of the bed not knowing what time it was. I saw something moving and squinted to see what it was. I saw a baby's hand in the air with fingers moving around. I then saw an adult hand playing with the baby hand. I thought Dan must have gotten up and took Killian in bed with us. Then I heard the whimpering again coming from the crib. Now I thought maybe it was Piper in bed and Killian was still in his crib. I got up and saw Piper still sleeping in her crib and Killian still in his. I was very confused and when I looked over to see what Dan was doing, he wasn't there. His side of the bed was empty and he had already left for work about a half hour before. FREAKY!!!!

Wednesday, 7/22:

• Lily had a peepee accident...

Lily: "Lily peepeed. Sorry, Mommy."

Me: "It's OK, Lily. Just be more careful next time. You know when you have to go, right?"

Lily: "Yes, Mommy. Lily sorry. You still love me?"

Me: Heart aching - "Yes, Lily. Always. I love you so much. Nothing will ever make me stop loving you, no matter what."

Lily: "OK, Mommy. Lily love you. You're the best." 

• Piper fell asleep in her highchair after breakfast...

• while Killian cried...

The Colors of a Child

My three year old loves to dance. She loves to watch others dance and tries to copy their movements. One show we watch together is So You Think You Can Dance. It's fun to watch it with her as she tries to mimic all the diverse dancing on the screen.

On this week's show, the two dancers pictured above were paired together for a jazz routine. As I sat and watched the technique and musicality of the dancers, my daughter saw something else...

"That like Uncle K.C. and Cici" Lily said as she pointed to the television. Yes, my brother and his wife are of two different races. She of Guyanese decent and my brother a mix of German, English, Irish, and American Indian decent. The thought of them compared to this couple never crossed my mind, but to my three year old, this was just like her uncle and aunt. She was happy that she made this connection. She was happy that this young, beautiful, and talented girl reminded her of her Aunt Cici.

"Her hair in tie like Cici. Same like Cici, Mommy." My daughter's eyes glimmered with affection for this dancer as she moved across the television screen. Though I originally thought about color as her motivator to compare, I was now taken to a different place. A more innocent place where she may have seen the difference in the color of their skin, but was more enamored by the fact that this girl, this dancer, has similar hair to that of her aunt.

Now if we could all see through the innocence of a child's eyes, the world would be a more beautiful place.

A Look Back 7/10 - 7/16

Friday, 7/10:

• Got my hair cut. I decided to go back to my beloved pixie cut. This time though, keeping the front a little longer than I've had in the past. I was going to let my hair grow to the middle of my back or longer, but was getting annoyed by the mid length. I think I look my best with really long hair or really short. Also, I tend to hide behind long hair. I feel more confident with it short. I'll probably always keep it short now instead of my constant back and forth I've been doing since I was seventeen. And seriously - I lost two pounds just chopping it off!

Saturday, 7/11:

This is what a real mom of multiples looks like!

• Decided it was time to go grocery shopping when I used one of the last diapers for Killian and Piper after we ate breakfast. Luckily we had enough diapers to last through his morning blow-out. Sanitize wash kind of day.
• Dropped the kids off at my parent's house so Dan and I could go shopping without distraction. After unloading the groceries at home, we went back to my parent's to have dinner. My sister's boyfriend was there and this was the first time we met him. After dinner, Lily had to go #2. After helping her wipe her butt, this was the conversation...

Lily: "Does everybody want to see my poopoo?" 

Me: "I don't think everybody wants to see your poopoo."

Lily: Maybe not everybody, but somebody wants to see my poopoo."

Me: "Well, maybe you should ask if anybody wants to see it."

Lily: Now out of the bathroom and in the dining room, goes up to my sister's boyfriend, "Do you want to see my poopoo?" 

Me: Laughing silently. Sadly not embarrassed by this question coming out of my 3 year old's mouth. I am a true mom. 

Sunday, 7/12:

• We revisited a park at an Elementary School close to where we used to live before buying our house. The memories came back to the days where we watched Lily slide down a slide for the first time, and the times we took the ten minute walk from our apartment so Lily could play. At least this park isn't too far away. I really like it and will want to go back more often.

Monday, 7/13:

• Killian and Piper turned 9 months old. Took the monthly shots. All my babies are getting so big.

Tuesday, 7/14:

• Lily turned 3-1/2 years old. She's so beautiful, inside and out.
• Took Killian and Piper to the doctor for their 9 month checkup. Here are the stats:

Killian is 25 pounds, 14 ounces, 29 inches

Piper is 22 pounds, 1 ounce, 28 inches 

• The pediatrician thinks I'm lying when I tell her what they eat during the day. She thinks I'm overfeeding them, but I'm not. They eat three times a day: 22oz of formula a day, 1/4 cup of cereal (rice) + 1/2 banana or 1oz applesauce each for breakfast, 4oz of vegetables each for lunch, and 1/4 cup of cereal (oatmeal) each for dinner which I'll now be replacing with a protein. How is that over feeding them? I like their pediatrician, she was my pediatrician, but I think it's time to look for another. At least to get another opinion about their weights and hopefully someone who doesn't make faces when I tell them exactly what I feed my babies.

Wednesday, 7/15:

• Lily likes looking at this book we have - 100 First Words. She, for some reason likes it as her bedtime book. This was a fun moment in parenting...

Lily: "That a goose. What do goose eat?"

Me: "Umm. I think grass or corn."

Lily: "No."

Me: "No? So what do they eat, then?"

Lily: "Maybe... little girls don't go to bed."

Me: "They eat little girls that don't go to bed?"

Lily: "Yes."

Alrighty then. Sounds good to me!

• Took some videos... 

I love how Killian tries to put the pacifier back into Piper's mouth.

I love how Piper seems to be like, "Wait a sec. This isn't mine. Here Killian, take yours back." And Killian's all like, "Nah. I'm good. I got yours now."

Thursday, 7/16:

• I am officially ten pounds lighter than I have been since before I got pregnant with Lily. That's right! I haven't weighed what I weigh for four plus years. It feels good but I'm not done. Still not feeling my best, so I will continue on my path.

Just Don't Do It

A picture from Uncanny Annie's facebook page seems to be making the rounds on social media and I thought I might put my two cents in, for what it's worth. Being a mom of twins has definitely opened my eyes to a world that I never knew existed when my daughter (now 3-1/2 years old) was a baby. It's so different being out and about with twins, and I'm not talking about all the stuff I lug around. No, it's the comments and looks from complete strangers. So I had a thought, for all you people out there that think it's OK to ask personal questions to a mom of twins (or more), this is how it would be if you asked the same kind of questions to a singleton mom:

You would never think to ask a mother of a singleton how she conceived, so let's look at the questions I get asked on a regular basis when I'm out with my twins and 3 year old. BUT instead of looking at the questions as they are asked about twins, let's look at them as they would be asked about a singleton. Yes, may seem ridiculous, but so are the questions...

I was in Kohl's the other day with all three of my kids. My three year old happily jumping around the racks of clothes while my twins were happily playing with their stroller toys. I was shopping for me, something I rarely do these days, but I needed a dress for an upcoming wedding. So there I am, minding my own business and, no exaggeration, every person that I passed or who passed me stared at my twins and/or made a comment. Sometimes the comments were to me, sometimes they were to my three year old, and other times they were just out there in the air for me to hear or not. Three different women asked my three year old, "So, your the big sister? How nice that you got two baby brothers to look after." Uh, my twins are clearly boy/girl. So I don't put bows in my twin daughter's hair, but I dress her in girly clothes. On this particular day, my son was wearing a Star Wars shirt and dark gray shorts, and my twin daughter was wearing a turquoise tank with a pink, purple, and yellow polka dotted skirt. Clearly anyone who just glanced at my babies could tell they were different sexes. These three women though, were blind. They had to be.

Then there was the woman who told me, as she was touching my twin's feet, that she knew a set of twins once. Oh, good for you! I just smiled and slowly backed my stroller up so she would get the hint to "Stop touching my babies with your dirty stranger hands!" Seriously, don't ever touch a baby or a child unless you know the mother or father personally.

OK, I think I made my point here. For all of you who still don't get it, let me recap:

1. It's very nice that you are curious about twins, but please refrain from asking personal questions. It's rude and frankly non of your business. If you're that curious about how twins are conceived or if twins run in families, look it up on the internet. Just don't ask us.
2. Don't touch my kids. It makes me uncomfortable and it makes my kids uncomfortable. Unfortunately, most kids are too naive or respectful of adults to tell the person not to touch. Also, you might get bitched out by the mom. Sorry not sorry. Those are my kids and you are a stranger. Just don't do it.
3. Don't get pissy because all of us twin mommies (or triplet, quads, etc) don't want most of the attention when we are out and about. Give us a break. We're lucky to even be out and about. Don't bombard us with questions we don't really care to answer. Always think, "Would I be asking this mom the same questions if she just had one baby?" If the answer is yes, then it might be OK to ask, but if the answer is no, just don't do it. 
4. Look, I am very aware that some women may feel the need to ask certain questions because of their own personal reasons/struggles and I feel for you. Believe me, I went through so much pain and heartache to have my three babies. But that doesn't mean I want to discuss my trials with every stranger EVERY SINGLE TIME I leave my house. That's why some women write blogs. Look some up on the internet if your curious about other women's reproductive journeys. That's what it's there for.
5. Lastly, if you are to make a comment, please be respectful and make it quick. We really just want to get in and get out of wherever we are before the next feeding or tantrum pursues.

Thank you for reading!

A Look Back 7/3 - 7/9

Friday, 7/3:

• Conversation at 12:45 in the morning... 

Lily: "Lily so drinky. So long since I eat."

Me: "You're thirsty?"

Lily: "Yeah. Lily drinky. Check my temturer." **Takes the forehead thermometer and scans forehead**

Lily: **Shows thermometer to me** "4-0-5, Mommy."

Me: "Oh yes. 4-0-5. I see. Big temperature."

• Lily had a dentist appointment. It was a normal cleaning but I did have a concern about a black spot on her back left molar. Yup... a cavity. Ugh! A three year old with a cavity? Are you serious? Now she has to get a filling. I wrote a post about it HERE.
• In minivan with Lily, stopped at a red light...

Lily: "Mommy! That a nice house!"

Me: "What house?"

Lily: "That. Is that a house?" **Points to a 7-Eleven**

Me: "No. That's a store."

Lily: "Oh." 

Saturday, 7/4:

• Went out to my aunt's house in Greenport. Saw the tall ships... from afar. Didn't want to spend the day online waiting to get on one. 
• Lily went on the carousel with Dan, my sister Jackie, and my dad. She insisted on sitting on a white horse. When she saw a kid get on a white horse, she started to cry saying it was her horse.

• My brother let me have a sip of his beer. I wanted to drink it all. Actually, I wanted to pour some over vanilla ice cream, crawl up on the couch hugging the bowl, breathing in the delicious aroma that is root beer, and getting drunk in the process. A mom can dream, right?

Sunday, 7/5:

• Went to a birthday party for a girl I went to school with's son who was turning four. It was a Mickey Mouse party and they had a Mickey character there. Lily was so happy because she loves Mickey Mouse. While she was standing near him, she kept calling his name and asking him if he wanted some lemonade. 

Monday, 7/6:

• Hung out with a friend I haven't seen since I was pregnant with my twins. I think she enjoyed playing at the park more than Lily!

Tuesday, 7/7:

• Killian and Piper were in a pool for the first time. A little sitting pool, but a pool non-the-less. They liked it... I think. They didn't complain, not even when Killian spit up. So gross!

Wednesday, 7/8:

• Lily has been very observant about what she thinks is dangerous. While watching Disney's Tarzan, she kept saying, "Mommy, that danaous." Yes, Lily, don't ever "surf" on a tree limb. That is definitely "danaous!" She cracks me up!!

Thursday, 7/9:

•  Killian & Piper had their first ride in a swing! Piper seemed to really enjoy it. Every time the swing stopped, she kicked her legs, wanting to swing some more. Killian, on the other hand, didn't quite know what to make of it. He was actually swinging it himself. He kept moving his body a little back and forth. I think he was a little scared.

•  I had all three in the kitchen with me while I was preparing dinner. I needed to keep an eye on them, especially Lily who likes to think she is big enough to pick up and move Killian and Piper. While they were playing with Lily's magnetic alphabet toy, this happened...

• Killian loves his feet. Actually, he loves everybody's feet. Here's a short video of him telling me that...

A Cavity?

Lily eating yogurt

Lily actually likes brushing her teeth. She doesn't eat too many sweets. She loves drinking water and only has a small juice box once a day at dinnertime. She would rather eat vegetables than anything else, so why? Why does my little three year old girl have a cavity?

My heart sank deep into my chest as the dentist confirmed what I already guessed. The very small black dot on Lily's back, left molar is in fact, a cavity. "How does a three year old get a cavity?" I asked the dentist as she was finishing up her exam. "Lack of brushing or not brushing good enough. Mom, you really need to help her when she brushes. Do you?"

I felt like I failed in some way, or at least, that's how she made me feel. Fact is, I do help Lily brush her teeth. I help her every morning and every night. Lily brushes, then I brush. I also pay close attention to that back, left molar because six months ago, the dentist mentioned they were keeping an eye on it. So have I failed as a parent? As a mother?

I made the appointment for Lily's filling and got out of the office as quickly as I could. I was a little embarrassed, truth be told. I felt like I was being judged. In my head, all I could think was, "I actually do brush Lily's teeth with her twice a day. I know some parents who have such a hard time getting their kids to brush even just once a day. Why is Lily the one who gets the cavity?" When I got home I did some research on cavities in toddlers. I found out that I wasn't the only parent questioning why this occurs.

I found out that dentists will blame the parent. They blame lack of brushing. They blame not flossing. That definitely is part of it, but there could be another reason why a three year old can get a cavity - family history. Read this article: The Surprising Truth About Cavities posted on parents.com.

So I'm not a failure. Sure, I could floss more with her, but really? She's three. I'm lucky I get a chance to actually brush her teeth since she loves brushing them all by herself like a big girl. She likes to floss, but when I say it's my turn, she has a fit. "Lily big girl! Lily do it! Not Mommy! Lily!" Yes... all exclamation points!

So we go back next month to get the cavity filled. Now I have to make the choice of having them attempt to fill it with or without nitrous oxide. Things I wish I didn't have to worry about. As a parent, I can only assume there will be so many things I will be worrying about and this is just one grain of salt from the bottle of life.

A Look Back 6/26 - 7/2

• Friday, 6/26: Killian and Piper have been paying attention to one another a lot lately. I caught this on video...

• Saturday, 6/27: Pulled off Dan's surprise Star Wars 40th Birthday Party. Killian and Piper were amazing with all the people in our house. Didn't cry once. Lily was amazing as well. She was such a good sharer of her toys. So proud of her. I posted a blog about what I did for the party HERE.

Dan NEVER comes in the side door, but of course, decides to do it on this day.

• Sunday, 6/28: Lily begged for the ice cream man. Stopped the ice cream man. Lily got a vanilla cone with rainbow sprinkles. Took two licks of it and said, "Lily done. Tummy says, 'Thank you. I full.'"
• Piper's the sleepy princess. Caught this on video...

• Monday, 6/29: Lily has a dentist appointment this week but on one of my calendars it said, "Thursday at 11:30am" and on another calendar it said, "Friday at 11:30am." So I called the dental office and they said her appointment is on Friday at 12:30pm. Uh. OK. This is an example of mommy brain.
• Killian and Piper were in their cribs alone in the bedroom and I heard laughing. I poked my head in and they were facing each other, both on their bellies, making the other laugh. First time I have heard them communicating like that. Wish I caught that on video. 
• Tuesday, 6/30: Woke up feeling OK but as the day went on I felt more and more sick. Horrible ear pain and terrible pain when I swallowed. I was also getting dizzy and had tightening in my chest. At 5:45pm I took my temperature and it was 101.2º. I figured I shouldn't wait to go to the doctor since if I was contagious with something I didn't really want to get the whole house sick. Turns out they couldn't find anything wrong. I hate that! The doctor did say that it may just be too early for the strep test to come back positive. There may just not be enough bacteria to detect strep at this point. Because of my symptoms though, he treated it as strep and now I'm on antibiotics for ten days. I just hope no one else gets sick, especially Lily, Killian, and Piper.
• Caught this on video, Killian giving Piper a pillow...

• ... and this where Lily gives raspberries to everyone and everything...

• Thursday, 7/2: Lily has been saying, "Oh my God, Oh my God." It's the funniest thing. She scraped her knee Wednesday, so today, Thursday, she said, "Oh my God. Look at my booboo. Oh my God." I tried not to laugh in front of her.
• At bedtime, Lily has the realization she, too will get a period...

Lily: "When Lily bigger girl, Lily have blood like you."

Me: "What?"

Lily: "Lily have blood like Mommy. One day. Not now. When Lily big girl like Mommy."

Me: "Yes, yes you will." **laughing so hard in my head** 

 

A Look Back 6/19 - 6/25

• Saturday, 6/20: Lily and I were looking at a picture of me when I was pregnant with Killian and Piper...

Lily- "When Lily big girl, me have Piper in my belly."

Me- "Well, you can have your own baby inside your belly."

Lily- "NO! ME HAVE PIPER IN MY BELLY!!"

Me- "OK. Calm down."

Lily- "Can Lily have Piper and killian in my belly?"

Me- "Sure, Lily. You can maybe have twins, too."

• Sunday, 6/21: Father's Day. It was a lovely day that consisted of breakfast in the morning, just the five of us. Lily gave Daddy her gift... Matching Mickey Mouse shirts. 
  

Then I took a pic of all of them...

Then I got the best father's Day gift of all... yeah, you heard that right. Dan took the kids to his parent's house and I got to spend some much needed alone time to get a few things done. After I danced and sang my heart out to a very loud mix of my favorite 90's girl bands, I cleaned a bit. It was a good time!

• Monday, 6/22: Lily is too funny...

Lily- "Piper is a brother."

Me- "No. Piper is a sister. Killian is a brother." 

Lily- "Killian is a son and Daddy is a son."

Me- "That's right! And what are you?"

Lily- "Lily a moon."

•  Also Monday, 6/22: This happened-

• Killian got his 2nd tooth this week. Now he has both bottom fronts. Piper already has four teeth. Is it wrong for me to tell Killian he's losing to his sister in the milestone department. Maybe I should stop that since, 1: it really isn't a competition. And 2: I really don't want them to feel like everything is a competition with the other.

Co-sleeping: A Love/Hate Relationship

My husband and I have, on and off, been co-sleeping with our three year old daughter for all of her life.  She was and is a great sleeper, but sometimes she just wanted or needed to be close to us while she slept. It was never an every night thing until I got pregnant with our twins. Now, she goes down in her room about eight o'clock and wakes up around midnight to come into bed with me and her daddy. I thought it might stop after the twins arrived, thinking it was because she was concerned about me or maybe feeling like she needed a little more attention, but it didn't.

I love the fact that my daughter loves me so much she wants to cuddle with me all night. That she wants to have her head on my shoulder, chest, or stomach while she sleeps. I love it, but I can't stand it at the same time. I am constantly smothered while I try to sleep. She moves around so much I inevitably end up almost falling off the bed. Don't even get me started on the covers. She likes to sleep above the covers, which would be fine, but she decides to kick and jerk her whole body out from under them the moment I am almost asleep. Then I have to quickly grab the covers that are over me so they don't get pulled off and pinned down by her legs.

I curse a bit in my head at this point. Why do I keep letting her into our bed? Why do I put up with the smothering? I got head butted in the nose the other night, so hard I thought my nose was broken. Why don't I just put my foot down and be stern about staying in her own bed? Why? Because as much as I hate it when I'm in that moment, I love it even more. She is my rainbow baby. My first born. She is almost three and a half. I'm going to blink and another three years will pass, then another. How many more years do I have where she loves me so much she wants to be that close to me? How many more years do I have where she whispers, "I love you, Mommy. I love you so much" in my ear right before we fall asleep?

One day, she will turn on me. She will say that she hates me. She will not want me to hold her anymore because she will think she is too big for that. She will no longer want to hold my hand while we fall asleep. She will no longer need me like that and it makes me sad. I hope I can keep our mother/daughter relationship close and loving. I will always tell her everyday that I love her and I hope that she will always tell me. I am hopeful, but I know how I was with my mom. I hear stories of other mothers and daughters. The majority of tweens and teens turn on their mothers. I really don't want that for me and any of my children. So I will continue to co-sleep for as long as she wants. Because it makes her feel safe. Because it makes her feel loved. Because it makes her feel comforted. Because it makes me feel needed. Because it makes me feel loved. Because it makes me still have my baby girl.

A Look Back 6/12 - 6/18

• Killian and Piper turned 8 months old on Saturday, 6/13. 
• Took some great shots of the kids...

• Visited the Nassau County Museum of Art on Sunday, 6/14, where Dan and I were married back in September of 2009. After giving Killian and Piper lunch, we packed everybody in the van, picked up lunch for Dan, myself, and Lily, and headed to the museum to have lunch in the formal gardens at the very spot we said our I do's. Lily kept asking where the "real" park was and when we were going there. We told her that not all parks have slides and swings, but being three years old, she just didn't get it.

• On Tuesday, 6/16, it rained on and off. I let Lily put her bathing suit on and we went outside to feel the rain on us. It wasn't thundering or lightning out, so why not? It's natures sprinkler! Anyway, I decided to do some weeding in the rain. I should always do the weeding in the rain. It felt nice not having the hot sun beating down on me while working outside and the added bonus of the cool raindrops made it even better.
• Wednesday, 6/17, was Lily very last day of an early educational school we've been going to since she was 8 months old. We started out doing Mommy and Me classes then I started dropping Lily off there for a two hour session each week for the past year and a half or so. It's a bittersweet ending to this stage in her life. Come September, she will start pre-K and I will no longer be able to call Lily a toddler, she will be a pre-schooler. 

                         
                                                      Ms. Rhona                                                                           Ms. Denise

• On Thursday, 6/18, Lily said the strangest thing to me. It was one of those "kids say the darndest things" moments, but I thought about it too much and now I'm feeling weird, like she knows something I don't. Here's how it went down: We were going through a picture book of 100 first words and Lily was naming everything in the book. Something I was very proud of because of her speech issues she had last year. Anyway, there was a parrot in the book and she said she wanted one. Then I said I like birds and maybe one day we could get one. Then she looked over at a toy parrot she has and said...

"Mommy, Lily already has a parrot."

"OK, Lily. Maybe we can get a real one someday."

"Mommy, when you are a little girl again, like me, you can have one." 

Hmm? A little girl again? So, does she think we get reincarnated? Maybe she thinks I'm like Benjamin Button? Or, most likely, she's three years old and has no clue what she just said!